So it's my sisters wedding next saturday(1 week), and i'm probably gonna do the first speech, and after me, i'm gonna hand it over to my sis husband/brother in law so he can do one.
Just curious, but any advice? It's gonna be around 3 min~ long probably.. so far my dot points are
-personal introduction
-welcome to all the guests, family and friends
-say some shit about how i've always wanted a brother, and welcome my bro in law to the family(i'm the only son, and my sister is only sister in my fam)
-tell some story about my sis, which will probably most likely be about me apologizing to her for putting her through all the shit that our family has been through because of me, then say some shit about how regardless of how much of a fuckup i am, she was always there for me and that i've seen her grow from a lil shit into a mature adult who's now a woman(although i might leave out the 'woman' part, that sounds kinda cheesy and probably shouldn't be coming from her older brother.. lol)
-then wrap the shit up and hpoe that everyone has a great night, and that if any single women like what they heard/see, i'll be sitting over there, come have a drink with me single ladies.. I'll also use my parents/grandparents as an excuse, since i'll say that they are forcing me to say this and i'll pretend like i'm embarassed n shit, but also give a knowing wink at the end to any hotties i see around.. ;)
^^This above should also win points with my parents/grandparents generation n that crowd etc, i just hope that my uncle doesn't lose anything in translation and make me come off sounding like some sleazebag cunt.. haha
I was gonna do an "Obama out" moment and drop the mic, but yeah. This is gonna be early at the reception just after the bride/groom has walked in i think, and everyones still gonna be straight and also hungry.. and yeah, sadly, I gotta pass it to the groom next, so no mic dropping.
I just hope that my uncle(who's gonna be MC for the night, and who will also be translating my shit to chinese for all the non english savvy old fucks like my grandparents n there generation lol) can loosen/lighten up the crowd n shit for me, i don't want no hardcore critical crowd, and i specifically inquired about the atmosphere/time etc and my sis told me that they won't be drunk yet and it's still really early, so yeah. That's why i'm going with such a topical/generic speech, even though i really wanted to make it fun and include some more 'controversial jokes'. IE i wanted to keep it real, but sadly, doesn't look like i can :(
My uncle will also kick my ass if i embarrass him like that and he can't translate my shit properly or pull off the jokes i make in the right context.. Although thinking about it, i might throw in one joke that he can't translate just to fuck with him and i'll see what he does ahhahaha. I just remembered about this, this is gonna be worth it. This will be my little 'insiders joke'.. i'll throw shit at the old non english speaking generation to garner points with the younger professional crowd, hopefully some nice young girl will get wet from my speech and style and come visit my table later ;)
Any tips/advice or stories about your own wedding/speeches etc will be helpful and would also be a fun thread/interesting read, so i thought why not make this topic.
Also, if you guys have any tips for any shirts to go with my suit from the other thread, let me know. Ill probably buy a slim white shirt to go with that suit, probably wear skinny black tie
Just curious, but any advice? It's gonna be around 3 min~ long probably.. so far my dot points are
-personal introduction
-welcome to all the guests, family and friends
-say some shit about how i've always wanted a brother, and welcome my bro in law to the family(i'm the only son, and my sister is only sister in my fam)
-tell some story about my sis, which will probably most likely be about me apologizing to her for putting her through all the shit that our family has been through because of me, then say some shit about how regardless of how much of a fuckup i am, she was always there for me and that i've seen her grow from a lil shit into a mature adult who's now a woman(although i might leave out the 'woman' part, that sounds kinda cheesy and probably shouldn't be coming from her older brother.. lol)
-then wrap the shit up and hpoe that everyone has a great night, and that if any single women like what they heard/see, i'll be sitting over there, come have a drink with me single ladies.. I'll also use my parents/grandparents as an excuse, since i'll say that they are forcing me to say this and i'll pretend like i'm embarassed n shit, but also give a knowing wink at the end to any hotties i see around.. ;)
^^This above should also win points with my parents/grandparents generation n that crowd etc, i just hope that my uncle doesn't lose anything in translation and make me come off sounding like some sleazebag cunt.. haha
I was gonna do an "Obama out" moment and drop the mic, but yeah. This is gonna be early at the reception just after the bride/groom has walked in i think, and everyones still gonna be straight and also hungry.. and yeah, sadly, I gotta pass it to the groom next, so no mic dropping.
I just hope that my uncle(who's gonna be MC for the night, and who will also be translating my shit to chinese for all the non english savvy old fucks like my grandparents n there generation lol) can loosen/lighten up the crowd n shit for me, i don't want no hardcore critical crowd, and i specifically inquired about the atmosphere/time etc and my sis told me that they won't be drunk yet and it's still really early, so yeah. That's why i'm going with such a topical/generic speech, even though i really wanted to make it fun and include some more 'controversial jokes'. IE i wanted to keep it real, but sadly, doesn't look like i can :(
My uncle will also kick my ass if i embarrass him like that and he can't translate my shit properly or pull off the jokes i make in the right context.. Although thinking about it, i might throw in one joke that he can't translate just to fuck with him and i'll see what he does ahhahaha. I just remembered about this, this is gonna be worth it. This will be my little 'insiders joke'.. i'll throw shit at the old non english speaking generation to garner points with the younger professional crowd, hopefully some nice young girl will get wet from my speech and style and come visit my table later ;)
Any tips/advice or stories about your own wedding/speeches etc will be helpful and would also be a fun thread/interesting read, so i thought why not make this topic.
Also, if you guys have any tips for any shirts to go with my suit from the other thread, let me know. Ill probably buy a slim white shirt to go with that suit, probably wear skinny black tie